Saturday, October 5, 2013

The Grand Grotesquerie: September 21, 2013


Los Angeles, California: September 21, 2013

On the Grand Grotesquerie:

If you have ever had the opportunity to attend one of Mihail’s extravagant extravaganzas, then you might understand why I needed a few days to process the evening’s festivities.  It seemed that every corner writhed with naked bodies, and the air was thick with the smell of blood and bile.  Things were happening in those corners, but I don’t dare describe them.  Let’s just say that Mihail is known for pushing boundaries!

I pity to think of those who missed this little shindig because, and I do so hate to be the bearer of bad news, this was your last chance.  Mihail has retired, passed on the torch (to a Giovanni no less), and disappeared into the night! 

We were saddened, and perhaps a bit shocked, to learn that Mihail’s childer had been killed only two weeks prior to the Grotesquerie.  It added to the curiosity surrounding his decision to host his (in)famous party three years ahead of time.  Not that it kept the guests from turning out in droves, and it seemed that Mihail was happy for the distraction!


On those who disappointed and those who delighted:

Judging by the way some of those guests were dressed you could only assume they stumbled onto the Martyr’s Obsession out of sheer luck!  It didn’t go unnoticed, either.  In a crowd of so many spectacularly dressed individuals, it was the jeans and t-shirts that stood out like sore thumbs!  Our host took note and considered it as a personal affront.  He had provided his guests with the chance to truly show off their colors and some decided not to take advantage of the masquerade-friendly environment.

Jeans and t-shirts.  How Ungracious!

Sure, not everyone could be as outrageous, and I mean that in a good way, as DeAnna Eldritch of clan Toreador—she sported a wedding dress and hair in a glorious shade of lavender—but at least put a little effort into your outfit. 

It’s not like you’re attending The Party of the decade…oh wait.

But, let’s not waist time on plebeians. 

I’ve already mentioned Ms. Eldritch’s extraordinary party digs, but she wasn’t the only one who really stepped it up that night. 

How fantastic was Harpy June’s hat!  Can you call it a hat?  I don’t care what you call it; I was absolutely wild about it!  Even Mihail couldn’t help but comment on it.  I’m sure you all had the chance to meet this enchanting example of charm and wit.  It was truly a delight to work alongside her as a Talon, along with the ever-lovely Leigia Loxley. 

Elder Tamerlane was a vision in copper!  I don’t know that I’ve ever known someone to cut such a striking figure.  The gown itself was exquisite, but she just had that It factor.  The way she carried herself!  That grace!  I was positively enthralled!  She is truly a noble lady.


On the debutante and how she handled the evening:

Raina Thomas von Daun—I’m so excited to get to call her that now—the newest member of House von Daun, made her social debut that night and boy did she shine!  It’s easy to get overwhelmed being surrounded by so many illustrious (not to mention intimidating) kindred, but she carried herself with all the aplomb and dignity one would expect from a member of such an acclaimed house.  I’m definitely looking forward to seeing this lovely rose bloom! 

Our eccentric host offered her a few words of wisdom.  Noticing her reserved demeanor—being in the midst of such daunting figures calls for reservation—he loudly remarked that if she wanted to make an impression she had to, “Fucking own it!”  Not exactly the way I would have put it, but needless to say Mihail’s peculiar way of speaking matches his peculiar sense of style!


On Elder von Daun’s newest project:

Speaking of House von Daun, have you heard that Elder Viveka has taken a new artist under her wing?  I have it straight from the source that my very own beloved cousin Selene de Lorraine, Harpy of Washington, has found herself a most excellent patron.  As you can imagine, I am aflutter with excitement!  I can hardly stand it!  Elder Viveka has always chosen the most prestigious and promising artistes.


On those dressed to impress with poor follow through:

Lilly Belle Stafford of House Thorne undoubtedly made an impression in a lavish red ball gown. 

I’ll leave it to you to decide just what sort of an impression that was. 

Certainly, there are some who have praised her beauty.  If only her attitude matched the outer shell.

It seems that when the Toreador met to have their meeting they nearly started without the Eldest von Daun!  Not only did they neglect to inform her of the meeting—a mistake Elder Delgado and Elder Preston saw to correcting—but most of them seemed to be ignorant of her presence at the gathering all together! 

Now, I could go into how much of a crime that is, but I’ll let it slide. 

When Elder Viveka made her offense known to Ms. Stafford and the Toreador Primogen, the Keeper of Elysium loudly exclaimed, “Well, I don’t know who you are!”  Can you believe the nerve!? 

Of course, Elder Viveka did not bat an eye.  She has always been a most dignified individual, and this instance was no exception.  I can only imagine the stunned silence that followed such an exclamation.  To think, someone could be so ignorant as to who the other Elders of their clan are, it’s maddening!  And when the Primogen realized that Elder Viveka might have taken further offense he tried to pass it off as a joke!

You’d think a former harpy of the Camarilla (I’m sure you all remember the Raylan Carlyle Affair) would have a better handle on politics then that! 


On Atlanta’s Scourge debacle:

I can’t not talk about the rumor going around that Prince Nicola Adorno of Atlanta appointed a Caitiff and an Assamite to work as her scourges! 

I swear, you leave a city and everything turns on its head! 

Needless to say the ship was abuzz with speculation over its apparent truth and the ramifications of such a decision.  The Assamite is only recognized after all. 

I’ve heard that it is in fact the Caitiff that holds the actual position while the Assamite works as his assistant.  Which is slightly less scandalous.  But if such is the case, then I have to wonder why Simon Striga (the Assamite for those who aren’t following) is happy to perpetuate the belief that he in fact holds a position in the Camarilla?  He knows very well the controversy it has created, specifically the scrutiny Prince Adorno now faces, and he seems to delight in it!

He’s certainly the most approachable Assamite I’ve every encountered, but that doesn’t makes his hands any less bloody.

Still, I trust Prince Adorno has a handle on things.


On various scandals and other bits of hearsay:

            On the changing of names:
I have it on good authority that the reason Simon Delgado has changed his name to Adam is to avoid sharing the moniker with an Assamite.  Maybe the troublesome Mr. Striga can be convinced to change his name.  He’s already changed it so many times, what’s one more? 

On the Brujah:
It seems that the Prince of London found himself snubbed in a similar way to our dearest Viveka.  The Brujah failed to alert him to the fact that there was a clan meeting to be held that evening.  Only when it was brought to their attention they shrugged it off and no one seemed in any particular hurry to correct this oversight. 

Now, I know a couple of Scholars and I hold them in highest regard (some I might even call friends), so I shall leave the blame of this little mishap on the shoulders of the Brujah Primogen of LA.  All things considered, it was (should have been) his responsibility to ensure that everyone was aware of the meeting.

The Prince of London, by the way, was an absolute delight.  A very wise individual and a great conversationalist.  I do hope that he has it in his heart to give the States another chance.  I would lament not getting another chance to speak with him.
           
            On Dracula:
Dracula was said to be on board!  Do you know this is the second party I’ve been to that was crashed by a Tzimisce?  The thought just makes me want to crawl out of my skin!  To think that I could have been two steps away from running into Vlad Tepes himself!  I shudder at the idea. 

Thankfully Mr. Rutherford was there to usher him away and save us all from that uncomfortable encounter!  There wasn’t even a scene.  He asked, and Dracula left!  For his impressive display he is now known as Dragon Slayer.

            On the truth of a terrible joke:
So, have you heard the one about the three Tremere and an Assamite?  I swear it isn’t a joke.  Apparently these particular Tremere engaged in such monstrous blood sport that it made the Assamite uncomfortable!  Dearest June has a much better (read: firsthand) account of that particular little matter.  You can read it here.


On upcoming events:

Prince Max Powers of Riverside will be hosting his own little party at the end of October.  You should think about going!  After all, any party can be a real swinger if the right people are there. 

While you’re there you should meet his seneschal Rotham Razul. 

You’ll know him when you see him, he likely be in an open shirt with a microphone hanging around his neck.  I can only imagine he dresses this way because he’s a famous rapper.  Yes, my dear readers, I said it.  A famous rapper.  “What is that?” I hear you asking.  Well I think the resplendent June put it best.  He wraps words around music. 

Somehow he uses this ability to help protect the masquerade?  I’m not entirely sure how that is supposed to work, but if you’re curious you can ask him yourself. 


Final notes:

It was an absolutely fabulous evening full of fabulous people.  You should have seen House Constantinian, we looked so dapper in our lovely gowns and sharp suits.  I don’t want to sound like I’m bragging, but it was a true show of force! 

Harpy June, it was an absolute delight.  I hope to visit again soon.

Bisou, bisou
Desi